Frustrations of misperception

Last week my new boss was explaining how office relationships operate--"We have to like each other in order to work together, but we can't be friends at work"--confusing things like that. Negotiating what that means with the help of an engineer, somewhere later in the conversation he said, "Don't worry. I've got you pegged."

As laughingly i related this to a friend, she said, "Oh no, you're hard to pin down. He's in for some surprises." She's an insightful friend, and while she's probably aghast at me sometimes, she has known me several years in various shades so what she says is probably true.

That said, it drives me bonkers that in some ways i feel like my new boss--of a week and a half--knows parts of me better than some do who should know me better.

It's bad enough that i usually feel like a gangling fourteen year old without someone thinking i still am that person. And yes, i do act goofy, i don't act my age--but heck, i pay my rent, hold down two jobs, earned two degrees with a third in process, and i'm paying--or promissory noting--my own way through. I've lived in Africa on my own and traveled around the world alone, attended a variety of social situations and handled myself quite okay, and while i second guess everything, i can make good decisions. Sure, i have fears: I hate making telephone calls; i get a little stage fright. They hardly cramp my style.

I hate those pointless arguments-in-germ of "You are this way". If i say that isn't accurate, and they repeat it, "Yes you are", it's crazy to mention it again. If i live down to their expectations that's stupid, but it's equally twisted and unhealthy to drive myself to prove them wrong.

Grrr, grrrr, GRRRRR. What is the God-honoring response here and how will i ever find the grace to do it!?