Sunday, March 22, 2009

In the grand scheme of things

In the grand scheme of things, school may not matter. I doubt that on my deathbed i'll bewail the fact that i never had a 4.0 after high school.

On the other hand, who knows? That slip in gpa my senior year of college was one reason i didn't get into a PhD program in international diplomatic history. I'm glad, in hindsight, that i didn't get into that program, but the gpa did play a role. What if it plays a role later in something else more important?

And what about presentations? Earlier this week i was stressing out over two upcoming presentations. One was individual, and one was a team. Team work stresses me out more because my performance affects others directly, and i don't want to affect their gpas negatively. The individual presentation might have been observed by prominent academicians. I'm not sure why that was stressing me out, except that i wanted to do well, and wanted to impress in a good way--in a way that meant someone would be happy to write a reference letter, say. And all that stress led to a whopping migraine, which didn't help any of the work get done, which didn't help alleviate any stress!

A few helpful people started saying that, y'know, relax, these aren't that important, they aren't a matter of life and death. Trick is, i knew that. I know that. I also know that i am capable of presenting well, but i had a lot of work to do to prepare and trying to plan that preparation time in, knowing how horrible my concentration can be, is what stressed me out. The thought of being unprepared, not stage-fright. Furthermore, i agree: as a matter of life and death, these do not matter.

But i may have many years before i die, and i have a feeling they play a significant role for the interim.

1 comment:

Aquajag said...

You sound stressed...

The whole "grades don't really matter" thing can be annoying! Because, it seems that they do! Sometimes, anyways. Some people around here love saying over and over "C stands for Passing." And they follow that up with "No one will ever care about your GPA." Which annoys me, because if someone wants to do post-grad studies, then people often DO care about the GPA. To which the C=Passing people say, well yeah, then. To which I say, then why did you say "no one?" That's just not helpful to some people in the room, because now they have been told that their desire to do well is totally misplaced, and they need to re-prioritize. And usually the whole "C=Passing" thing is said in contexts of priorities, and I understand some people freak out too much about grades, but hey, that's gonna happen! Let us!

So I ranted on your thing! Sorry about that. Suffice to say, I understand your stress, and hope you muster up the gumption to ace the papers.

Or at least do well. ;)

birding life list (in process!)

  • White-crowned Sparrow (Zonotrichia ?) in winter
  • Western Wood-Pewee (Contopu sordidulus)
  • Western Tanager (Piranga ludoviciana)
  • Western Scrub Jay (Aphelocoma californica)
  • Western Bluebird (Sialia mexicana)
  • Tufted Titmouse (Baeolophus bicolor)
  • Stellar's Jay (Cyanocitta stelleri)
  • Sparkling Violetear (Colibri coruscans)
  • Snowy Owl (Nyctea scandiaca)
  • Snowy Egret (Egretta thula)
  • Ruddy Duck (Oxyura jamaicensis)
  • Red-winged Blackbird (Agelaius phoeniceus)
  • Red-tailed Hawk (Buteo jamaicensis)
  • Pied Crow (Corvus albus)
  • Northern Mockingbird (Mimus polyglottos)
  • Northern Cardinal (Cardinalis cardinalis)
  • Mourning Dove (Zenaida macroura)
  • Mallard (Anas platyrhynochos)
  • male Superb Sunbird (Cinnyris superbus) i think
  • Malachite Kingfisher (Alcedo cristata)
  • Lesser Goldfinch, greenbacked (Carduelis psaltria)
  • Lazuli Bunting (Passerina amoena)
  • Indigo Bunting (Passerina cyanea)
  • House Finch (Carpodacus mexicanus)
  • Hooded Oriole (Icterus cucullatus nelsoni)
  • Greater Roadrunner (Geococcyx califorianus)
  • Great Horned Owl (Bubo virginianus)
  • Great Blue Heron (Ardea herodias)
  • Congo African Grey (Psittacus erithacus erithacus)
  • Common Garden Bulbul (Pychonotus barbatus)
  • Cinnamon Teal (Anas cyanoptera)
  • Cattle Egret (Bubulcus ibis)
  • Canada Goose (Branta canadensis)
  • California Towhee, juvenile (Pipilo crissalis)
  • California Thrasher (Toxostoma redivivum)
  • Brown Pelican (Pelecanus occidentalis)
  • Blue Jay (Cyanocitta cristata)
  • Black-crowned Night-Heron (Nycticorax nycticorax)
  • Black-capped Chickadee (Poecile atricapillus)
  • Black Phoebe (Sayornis nigricans)
  • Black Crowned Waxbill (Estralida nonnula)
  • Bald Eagle (Haliaeetus leucocephalus)
  • Anna's Hummingbird (Calypte anna)
  • American Robin (Turdus migratorius)
  • American Kestrel (Falco sparverius)
  • American Goldfinch (Carduelis tristis)
  • American Coot (Fulica americana)
  • American Avocet (Recurvirostra americana)
  • African Pygmy-Kingfisher (Ispidina picta)
  • Acorn Woodpecker (Melanerpes formicivorus)